Episode 201 - The Evolution Of Grief

Why did my mother give me my name.... Darwyn?

Last week I talked about change... change while going through the changes that grief brings.

This week is about the evolution of grief... how my grief has evolved and how I have evolved (or maybe not) around it.

I used to be angry, lost, confused in the immediate days and years following my dad's death.

Somehow, somewhere I found the act of forgiveness which allowed me to release the anger and begin to have some sort of inner peace. I used to believe that some people are crazy or are monsters and just want to hurt people.

I believe now that there is a reason why most people do what they do, even the bad things and we don't want to take the time figure out or to understand why.

I've changed my thoughts on knowing why my father was killed.
I now have this burning sensation to sit down with one or more of the people who committed this murder and simply ask, "Why?" I know I'll never get ananswer that justifies the reason.

While I have evolved in some respects, in others I have not. I still ignore the signs that people give right before they die.

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 Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com)