Dealing With My Grief

As the calendar has turned to 2019 I have a few things that I have found true about grief that I need to remember from time to time.

1. Grief is a marathon and not a sprint... that never ends. It has no finish line. We will carry our loss forever.

2. You will fall off the wagon. At some point you will see something or do something that will remind you of a loved one. Like hearing a favorite song that was special between the two of you.

3. Speaking of songs just like the one's you listened to in in high school... it's ok to be happy, to laugh and fondly reminisce about good times with your loved one.

4.People may say things that are insensitive or may seem insensitive, but that is not the intent of those people. Sometimes they just don't know what to so, but more importantly they don't know that it's OK to say nothing but just listen.

5. The quickest path to moving forward is to be proactive... If you wait for the world to come rushing to you to help you move forward. That may not happen.You have a voice ... use it. You must let people know what you need or how to help you when you are actively grieving. I'm online a lot and see people preaching to the choir. The people in online groups know what your going through because you have a shared experience with them. Your friends and co-workers may not

6. There is no magic potion that makes everything better right away. Give them time to work and then try different things. The coping mechanism you use will work until... they don't. Sometimes you'll find out that you just can't mentally get those coping mechanisms to work and when you can't, you have to...

7. Just go thought it. If only to prove to yourself that you can.

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